The Marvellous Moggy

There’s something for which most of us all share a great affection

A thing that’s like a living welcome mat

While some like dogs for comradeship and sometimes for protection

A lot of people own a much loved cat.

Now ‘own’ is hardly relevant as most of us would know

It will tolerate you if it wants a snack

While you can call a dog and he’ll come running to your side

The cat says "Leave a message, I’ll get back."

Now some are quite affectionate while others are aloof

And some are just delicious balls of fluff

But if you stroke it longer than its wanting to be stroked

You’ll surely know when it has had enough.

There are some that twine around your legs and some sit on your lap

The minute you sit down they’re in your face

Although its nice, the thing is when they finally get off

You end up with their hair in every place!

Their favourite spot’s the keyboard when you’re trying hard to work

They lie across it, totally spread out

Or if you try to read, they lie completely on your book

Its just to brass you off, without a doubt!

And first thing in the morning just before your eyes are open

You’ve the feeling that there’s something in your space

You slowly raise an eyelid and you’re greeted with the sight

of these staring eyes two inches from your face.

In winter its a ‘hottie’ as it comes and shares your bed

And down beneath the sheets it disappears

How deep it goes depends on just how cold the night’s become

You’d be lucky if you even saw its ears!

We all have favourite types of cat, there’s certainly a lot

Some of us like tabbies, some Burmese

But no matter what your preference there’ll be one just right for you

Whichever one you choose its sure to please.

Our cats are often with us for a great amount of years

And we love them like our children there’s no doubt

And when its time to leave us it can really break our hearts

As we watch the light behind their eyes go out.

So now we can remember all those precious little ones

And the pleasure that they gave us through the years

They’ll always be so special and they’ll stay within our hearts

As the memory of each ‘moggy’ reappears!

Food For Thought

Each country has food that they’re known for

Their own local dish you might say

Some are delicious and some a bit strange

And some I’d just think ‘oh no way!’

The Chinese of course have their dumplings

They love their pad thai in Bangkok

In Jamaica there’s salt fish and ackee rice too

In Hong Kong there’s fried rice in a wok.

They enjoy suckling pig in Korea

There are burgers in old USA

There’s a prawn on the barbie in Aussie

And Italians eat pizza each day.

I have tried tasty frog’s legs in Paris

But I didn’t enjoy escargot

A tandoori chicken in Delhi’s just fine

And black pudding in Scotland’s a go!

I really enjoy a Greek salad

A hot bowl of pho in Saigon

Yakatori’s a great way to eat in Japan

About food I could go on and on.

Of course there’s roast beef in Old Blighty

Consumed with a great Yorkshire pud

And smothered in gravy on Sundays

Could anything else be that good?

I love a nice tasty Welsh rarebit

And in Canada they eat poutine

We live in one huge worldwide kitchen

I’m sure that you know what I mean.

But now we’re back home in New Zealand

With pavlova, meat pies, L&P,

Vogels bread and our great kiwi icecream

There is no place that I’d rather be!

Tales Of Travel

I’ve been to so many great places

There are wonderful things that I’ve seen

However please don’t travel with me

Just go somewhere before I have been!

I was in New York City, two thousand and one

Hadn’t been there for thirty two years

I couldn’t have known that the very next day

The whole world would be shocked and in tears.

For I went to the top of the Towers

I was up there till well after 3

Then the very next morning I watched them fall down

It was something you don’t want to see.

Cinque Terre in Italy beckoned

And Vernazza’s where we chose to stay

But not long after we’d left that beautiful place

A flash flood washed a big part away.

Then in Nice we loved all the excitement

Of that Mediterranean town

Not much later some mad, crazy person

Drove a van and knocked so many down.

On a cruise on the QE I took just last year

We were anchored in port in LA

It was hit by an earthquake that morning

The worst in a decade they say.

So by all means enjoy your world travels

There’ll be sunshine, excitement and laughter

But whatever you do please be certain

That you go there before me, not after!

Partners

You’ve surely heard this little rhyme, its been around a while

But I’ll share it with you once again, its bound to make you smile

It’s ‘Women they have many faults but men have only two;

Everything they say and everything they do!’

And yet I’m always so impressed with things they know about

Like, how to change a tyre and drain the engine oil right out.

I haven’t got a clue so I’d just call up the AA

But the husband says who needs them and he does it straight away.

They’re good for changing lightbulbs, deepest secrets they’ll not tell

They’ll protect you from a spider then they’ll kill the sod as well!

They can get the fire blazing and it always seems a breeze

For them to warm the house up and make sure we all don’t freeze.

Their mechanic’s skills are brilliant, they know how to fix the mower,

The washer and the vacuum and the dodgy garden blower.

Of course they can’t have babies, multitask or ask directions

And to them the slightest cold means quite untreatable infections.

When we tell them of a worry and they see our eyelids glisten

They try to solve the problem when we just need them to listen.

But together we’re a partnership, its us against the rest

So I’ll just give thanks for what I’ve got and know I’ve got the best!

Memory

As I get older there’s something I’ve found

My memory is not at its peak

I remember the things from so many years back

Yet I hardly recall just last week!

I’m sure we could say where exactly we were

When someone well known left this earth

Or just where we watched the twin towers collapse

Or the time we went through our first birth.

But my short term recall has diminished somewhat

For my glasses I search in despair

I walk into a room to do "something"

But I’m damned if I know why I’m there!

I could happily name every moggy

I have loved so much over the years

But I can never remember my password

I’m so mad that I’m almost in tears!

So what do you think this is saying?

That it all was much better ‘back then’?

The past is the past and the future’s not here

So let’s live in the present again!

Captain Luca

Some of us are lucky to have grandsons

Those little boys who make your heart just burst

If I’d known just how much joy I’d find in grandkids

I’d have surely found a way to have them first!

A father-son relationship is special

Its lovely seeing dads with their wee boys

They learn so much from spending time together

That companionship is much more fun than toys.

My grandson’s an amazing little fellow

His imagination’s wildly off the chart

He knows exactly what he plans on doing

He’s six years old but knew it from the start.

He has no plans to be a firefighter

No policeman, racecar driver or mechanic

For he knows just where his destiny will take him

He’s going to be the Captain of Titanic!

He knows about the iceberg and what happened

He’s quite aware it didn’t end so well

He wants to raise it from Atlantic’s seabed

And after that, well only time will tell!

He’s planning to get married to his girlfriend

He says he’ll call his children ‘Jack’ and ‘Rose’

His wife will watch the wee ones while he’s ‘busy on the ship’

But just where they will sail to, heaven knows!

I’m sure his plans will change as he gets older

But his future will be brilliant I am sure

For Captain Luca has a great ambition

And long may all his hopes and dreams endure!

Back To The 60s

In 2020 life got complicated

We’re not sure how long these troubled times will last

In the good old days our lives were much more simple

And things were just a ‘bummer’ or a ‘blast!’

The things we liked were ‘fab’, or ‘boss’ or ‘groovy’

The other ones were just ‘uncool’ or ‘square’

And life seemed so laid back when we were younger

We grew up pretty much without a care.

But now we have a crisis with our water

We’re not sure just when this flaming drought will end

So let’s do what we did back in the 60s

‘Let it all hang out’ and ‘shower with a friend!’

The Best Medicine

There are certain things in life that make you happy

Some of them quite ordinary things

When you watch a bunch of children simply playing

You can feel the joy that ‘being little’ brings!

The house was always filled with children’s voices

The vibrant sound of growing girls and boys

Each part of it would make my life so joyous

That innocence of childhood ‘happy noise’!

In middle years you’re sometimes far too busy

To make a joke or even raise a smile

But we have to try and keep the joy of living

Even though life bogs us down once in a while.

I read somewhere of what helps keep you healthy

A tip that keeps the stress of life away

You need to have a wicked sense of humour

And a minimum of fifteen laughs a day!

I have a loving friend who’s in my age group

I guess we’re ‘oldies’ now to tell the truth

We’d have those fifteen laughs by morning tea time

We surely never felt ‘long in the tooth’!

If one of us was acting rather strangely

The other would just instantly relate

And know it was that well known ‘senior moment’

We’d both crack up which left us feeling great.

Its said that laughter even makes you slimmer

So laugh instead of diet’s my advice

I’d rather have a giggle than a donut

And it makes your face and figure both look nice!

We know that getting older’s not that easy

We’ve aches and pains we never had before

So if you’re down and feeling not that brilliant

Just ‘phone a friend’ and have a good guffaw!

Its certainly much cheaper than the doctor

And you’ll feel just so much better right away

For laughter is the most effective treatment

Even better than an apple every day!

The Visit Of ’53

There was a Queen in England who was loved by one and all

It seemed just like a fairytale when I was pretty small.

I knew her father died and so she had to take his place

She was no longer Princess but a Queen who reigned with grace.

And when we heard in ’53 that she was coming down

To our small land to visit us in almost every town

It caused such great excitement here in every little heart

We’d all be given time off school to go and play our part.

The day arrived, the time had come, we lined along the street

We stood for hours waiting and we wilted in the heat.

My wee legs were getting tired, I was only eight years old

But I had my little flag and my excitement’s uncontrolled.

‘She’s coming!’ is the cry and then my heart begins to pound

The car’s right there! She’ll see me! Then she turns ... and looks around.

My tiny heart was broken for she looked the other way

And all my dreams were ruined on that late December day.

I never got to see her face and she did not see me

And I shed a few sad tears that night for what was not to be.

And though the Queen’s now ninety four and I am seventy five

I’ll remember how I felt that day as long as I’m alive.

I still think she’s quite wonderful, even though I wasn’t seen

I’ll forgive the fact she broke my heart so Happy Birthday to the Queen!

Master Mars

I had a call on 0800-NANA

Would I be free to babysit tonight?

I couldn’t think of any other thing I’d rather do

So straight away I said ‘Yes, that’s alright!’

The two I’m looking after you’ll have heard of

I’ve written of them on this poetry page

Of course they’re Lily Kate and Captain Luca

And they’re now much older than the ‘baby’ stage.

Amazing how the sexes are so different

Girls love dolls and little boys like cars

But now they’re 8 and 6 and it is very plain to see

That ‘women are from Venus, men from Mars!’

A girl is just so easy and compliant

Goes off to bed and doesn’t turn a hair

A boy just spits the dummy and he thinks its all a plot

‘You’re making me go first, it isn’t fair!’

Of course he thinks I’m just a mean old lady

He’s still grumpy as I tuck him in to rest

But as he snuggles down and his wee eyes begin to close

He whispers ‘Love you Nana, you’re the best.’

The Chicken Invasion

There’s a strange occurrence happening in New Zealand we have heard

And its causing many pulses here to quicken

In a place called Titirangi, a quite quaint suburban village

Something has emerged - The Feral Chicken.

Now chickens are delightful if you just have one or two

But when two of them ‘go rogue’ it’s not that great

And thats what happened when two local birds were just set free

And took the opportunity to mate.

Their numbers grew so quickly and the place was overrun

With poultry scratching all around the place

There were about 200 and by now they weren’t so cute

These birds were really getting in your face.

There were several different points of view as always is the case

Some people liked them, some said that’s enough

So the local council listened and they put a plan in place

To catch and relocate them, which was tough.

They found a farm to take them which was such a stroke of luck

They managed to catch all except for two

The hens were very happy in their far away new home

It seemed the chook invasion now was through.

Then lockdown came and in those weeks the rooster and the hen

Did just what you’d expect from such a pair

And when the people all came out when we were virus clear

The poultry problem once again was there.

And now our feral chickens it appears have caught the eye

Of the famous horror writer Stephen King

So watch this space, these birds might just become another book

Now THAT could be an entertaining thing!

Back In The Day

I used to be a party girl

Like many of my friends

And back there in the 60s

There were lots of different trends.

Of course we all made love not war

So there were always hugs

But many other things were there

And some of them were drugs!

It was the age of Woodstock

San Francisco took our heart

The flower power movement

Was only just the start!

I have to say I didn’t try

Those things I didn’t need

But I was always dieting

So the doctor gave me ‘speed’.

Those tried and true amphetamines

Most surely saved the day

And I’d eat pills instead of food

The pounds just dropped away!

A bit of waccy baccy now

and then was so much fun

Then I came home and settled down

A new life had begun.

And now I’m long retired and

I look back on my youth

I sometimes feel nostalgic

And that’s certainly the truth.

But I am happy with my life,

My cocktails and my wine

I’ve got such fun filled memories

And I’m just doing fine!

Senior Driving

You notice when you become older

How much faster the time seems to go

It appears that some elderly drivers these days

Think they’ll beat it by just driving slow!

Of course this is just being funny

As driving’s a serious thing

And we’re all well aware that you need to take care

Or the danger it often can bring.

I first learned to drive in the 60s

Got my licence when I was fifteen

The roads were much quieter, the cars not so fast

But those days have long gone and been.

Our eyesight is not quite as good now

Our hearing’s a little bit less

If we don’t hear a siren or see the police car

What could happen is anyone’s guess!

The traffic today is just wicked

They drive like a bat out of hell

And those of us who are advanced in our years

May not handle the pressure that well.

After years of quite well-mannered driving

Those speedsters get right up our nose

But the answer is clear, let’s just go down a gear

So this is the thing I propose.

Its time to sit back and relax now

Sell the car, get the cash, lose the grief

Take a cab or have family drive you around

No more road rage, oh what a relief!

For the time has come to take it easy

For others we’ve always been there

And now its our chance to be be spoiled in return

And let them show just how much they all care.

Love Yourself

Life is not easy I hear people say

And for some it is really hard going

We can feel quite alone because others don’t know

As our struggles are often not showing.

Emotions can rule us and cause so much pain

Like depression, anxiety, self-doubt

And it makes things much worse if we bottle it up

For we often just can’t let it out.

I know it sounds simple but that’s not the case

And I understand many feel stressed

Just trying to cope with life day after day

As our sanity’s put to the test.

Some people have no one with whom they can share

So we need to watch out for a friend

Just call them and ask them if you can come by

And a shoulder or ear you can lend.

The emotion we nurture will come to the fore

So try and pick happy, not strife

The one thing to think of is which you will choose

For that one can take over your life

The obvious one you should pick would be love

So tend it and water it well

I give you permission to starve all the rest

And tell them to just go to hell!

The Mammogram

There are so many things that get flattened

A tyre, balloon, blow up bed,

But forget all the rest

Concentrate on your breast

And ensure you stay healthy instead.

Now we all feel a slight trepidation

When mammogram time rolls around

Though we know its not nice

We all follow advice

Its more accurate than ultrasound.

For our lives are so very important

And we need to make sure all is fine

So to settle our fears

We go every two years

And they check our squashed boobs, yours and mine.

Whatever it takes it is worth it

To get things checked out is a must

If a man had to do

What we have to go through

I’m sure we’d not see him for dust!

Cambridge Oaks Lifestyle Village

Theres a beautiful township called Cambridge

That I’ve come down to visit today

I was told that this village was lovely

And its obviously true what they say.

It’s really the new way of living

When you get older you see

And it seems Cambridge Oaks is the creme de la creme

And there’s no place that you’d rather be.

I have heard that there’s some duplication

Just take note of what clothes you put on

For if you don’t remember and get all confused

Then a Carol could get the wrong John!

I believe that a peacock resides here

Some aren’t keen and some maybe don’t mind

I suggest that he goes on an outing and then

Accidentally gets left behind!

You seem to have fun here in Cambridge

There’s rugby and racing and wine

You’ll be feeling no pain after your Happy Hour

If the drinks flow like they do at mine!

I have really enjoyed being with you

Its great to see so many folks

So I’d like to say thank you to Ros and to you

For having me at Cambridge Oaks.

The Chaser

A celebrity came to our Village

A person that most of you know

Shaun Wallace was visiting Auckland

And he came for two hours or so.

He was such a riveting speaker

He spoke of his time on the bench

He’s a Barrister, not just a Chaser

But I’m sure he’s chased many a wench!

He was really the friendliest person

He completely won over the room

And if I was 20 years younger I know

That I’d like to be chased and by whom!

The Gadget

Back in the 1980s a new gadget reached our shores

It changed the face of cooking such a lot

And we were quite astounded when we found that we could cook

In a plastic dish and not a metal pot!

Of course it was all new to us, it just seemed quite unreal

And everybody had to change their ways

So I started a new cooking school to teach them what to do

And how to use this latest kitchen craze.

I taught them several times a week, daytime and at night

The husbands came along to check it out

They really seemed to like the fact that dinner would be quick

No longer would they have to hang about!

They tried their hardest when at home but stories soon came back

Of fruit cakes cooked too long and set alight

Of spuds that were like bullets after they’d been ‘overnuked’

The list of near disasters was a fright!

I also cooked on radio, I had a weekly show

And the crew all got to eat the food prepared

The smell of chili one day got into the aircon ducts

The whole building had to be completely aired!

I’d be in the supermarket and I’d hear some little feet

By a breathless kid I’d then be overtaken

‘My mum told me to ask you, she forgot what you had said,

And she really needs to know what kinda bacon?’

I did a lot of testing, I wrote recipes as well

And one microwave just didn’t cut the mustard

So one would have the Sunday roast, another had the veg

While the third one whizzed around with pud and custard!

And now that brilliant gadget’s just a part of daily life

We wonder how we ever lived without it

For everything today is fast, we have to just keep up

So I’m pleased that I could teach you all about it!

All Through The Night

As I get older I don’t sleep as much

I’m awake quite a bit of the time

And lately I find when I’m out for the count

That I seem to be dreaming in rhyme!

This poetry lark’s taken over my life

And though it could be so much worse

I often wake up after 2 or 3 hours

Then just lie there and plan some new verse.

The subjects are varied, I never know just

what narrative lurks in my mind

My Captain Tom poem was written at 3

And that night sleep was left far behind.

I’ve written ’bout chocolate and wanting to buy

all the things that appear on the screen

The Single Sock Saga was written at 4

If a poet you’ll know what I mean!

And then there’s the people all over the world

Who message me during the night

And I can’t help myself ... I just have to reply

Not to answer just wouldn’t seem right!

But you know its been great and I’d not give it up

Its just as much fun as it seems

So I guess that’s my lot and I’ll have to accept

It’s now what I do in my dreams!

Addiction

I really love my Netflix

I enjoy my Lightbox too

Prime Video’s a goodie

and I don’t know what I’d do

without my TVondemand

ThreeNow is great as well

and just to top it off

I’m watching Neon for a spell.

For lockdown gave permission

to just turn into a slouch

but now I fear the time has come

to get up from the couch

Go out and feel the sunshine

and meet up with lovely friends

but the love affair with my TV

is one that never ends

There’s Blacklist, Vikings, and there’s Bosch

and my legs turn to jelly

when I am watching Luther

and see Idris on the telly

I think I’ve an addiction

and my eyes are turning square

so someone please remind me

there’s a whole big world out there!

The ‘Good Old Days’

When we were young we’d ride to school

Or walk there with a mate

At weekends we’d take off with friends

And often stay out late.

As long as we were home for tea

No worry came about

Because our parents knew that we

were safe when we went out.

We played in mud, we climbed the trees

We loved to find a nest

We drank our water from the hose

Thats when it tasted best!

They’d send us to the bakery

To buy a loaf of bread

The fact we’d eat half often got

A clip around the head!

We played all day, slept well all night

We’d not much bad behaviour

There wasn’t all those additives

I’m sure that was a saviour.

Just good home cooking every day

Of meat, three veg and pud

The meals our mothers served us up

Were always bloody good.

Of course we didn’t like it all

Who wants a brussels sprout?

But we were made to clean our plates

Or we could not go out.

We treated teachers with respect

As manners then were vital

We’d didn’t use their christian name

We always used their title.

Of course the good old days seem best

We often mourn our youth

But kids back then had much more fun

We all know that’s the truth.

Good food, fresh air and exercise

We had it by the score

I really wish I could go back

And have those times once more ...

Just Let Me Sleep

Does anyone else have much trouble with sleep?

Do you lie there just tossing and turning?

I’ve a problem with temperature, can’t get it right

I’m cold but my damned feet are burning!

So I stick my feet out from the duvet and hope

That they’ll cool down and then I’ll come right

But it just doesn’t work so I wave them about

It must look a ridiculous sight!

That still doesn’t work and I’m now wide awake

So I get up and grab me a drink

And two hours later I’m still lying there

All my brain wants to do is just think.

Of all of the things that I ever did wrong

The mistakes that I’ve made in my life

Its never the funny things, just all the times

Things went wrong or I landed in strife.

And now there’s a song going round in my head

Just one line and it won’t go away

I know the alarm’s set for six forty five

and I need to be right for the day.

But sleep still won’t come so I’m up once again

Think I’ll just watch a little TV

I heard if you can’t sleep its best to get up

So I’m going to try it and see.

I watch for a while and I’m thinking its worked

But I seem to have gone a bit wrong

Watched a quite scary program that’s not helped at all

Should have just played a nice gentle song.

I go into the kitchen and make a hot drink

Have a bite, and I stifle a yawn

I go back to bed and I fall straight asleep

And five minutes later its dawn!

I’ll go to bed early tonight that’s for sure

I’ll read for a wee while and then

I’ll turn out the light and be off to sweet dreams

That’s the plan, so I’ll try once again!

The Hands Of Time

I look into the mirror and I’m not sure who I see

The image is familiar but I’m certain that’s not me.

It doesn’t match the way I feel, I’m looking tired and drawn

But I’m no longer young and so I guess a little worn.

When you reach a certain age it all starts going south

There’s hair where there was none before, you’ve lines around your mouth.

The furrows ’tween your eyebrows just seem deeper every day

And speaking of the eyebrows, well they now have turned to grey.

I think I need some botox, it will ‘freshen’ me I hear

I may have frozen features but my forehead will be clear!

A nip, a tuck, a subtle lift will help restore my youth

But miracles don’t happen and sadly that’s the truth.

We can’t turn back the clock and what’s important is inside

An older face is beautiful, a shame to try and hide.

Then I realise what I’m seeing is a pleasant ‘lived in’ face

So I’ll just accept that this is me and learn to age with grace.

The Procrastinator

Time waits for no man I heard someone say

I can tell you that this is quite true

If you don’t get it done it will not go away

And will stay there, just waiting for you.

I’m a shocking time waster, I just ‘put things off’

If I’m honest I do seem to shirk

All the things that want doing right here and right now

And I don’t knuckle down and just work!

What is it that makes me this way I’m not sure

But I know that I need to get through it

The trouble with me is I turn a blind eye

When it’s obvious I should just do it.

The secret I think is to just take it slow

Don’t put ev’rything off ‘until later’

You should start with the small things but do it right now

Or you’ll just find the job’s getting greater.

So I’ll go and get started, the task is in hand

I’m determined I’ll get it completed

But then ‘something came up’ so I’ve put it aside

And, once more my resolve is defeated!

On Being Single

A lot of us have a great husband

And some of us live on our own

I’m personally glad I don’t have one

As I now have no reason to moan

’Bout the things that would really annoy me

Like the clothes he’d just drop on the floor

The toothpaste cap off and the toilet seat up

I could list like a dozen or more

But now I’m quite happily single

For this there’s a lot to be said

I don’t have to defuzz my legs any more

And I can eat crackers in bed

I watch what I want on the telly

Whenever I’m hungry I eat

I don’t have to hide clothing price tags

And in bed I don’t feel those cold feet!

I’m sure it is lovely to have one

I’m just saying that it’s not for me

It wasn’t so bad, even fun for a while

But now I feel wonderfully free.

Curry In A Hurry

I love a good curry, it’s out on its own

As a comforting Friday night treat

You can keep all your burgers and doner kebabs

Your nuggets and pizzas and meat.

I used to like fish with a good plate of chips

But now I just don’t give a darn

’Cos the tastiest meal that brings tears to my eyes

Is a curry and two garlic naan.

The dish can be chicken, or it can be lamb

A beef or a vege or fish

Whatever the type I will wash it all down

With a lager, and say ‘That’s delish!’

The side dishes too are a joy to behold

Each one of them’s just oh so nice

There’s poppadums, bhaji and chutney as well

With a huge plate of hot steaming rice!

We all have our favourites that we seem to choose

Butter chicken seems high on the list

Then there’s tikka masala, and lamb rogan josh

And the korma’s too good to be missed.

I love my chapatis, samosas as well

And I’m mad for a spicy paneer

The big problem is if you over indulge

You’re often not nice to be near!

The strength of a curry’s a personal thing

It might be extra hot you desire

Just remember that sometimes it’s not all that wise

Have you heard of the great ring of fire?

But let’s celebrate curry, that gift from the gods

It’s so special that surely we oughta

Just a handy wee tip, one I’m sure that you’ll like

With your curry drink beer, never water!

Seasons

The view from my window is lovely and bright

It’s so pleasant out there in the sun

I’ll just put on my trainers and get off the couch

Then I’ll go for a gentle wee run.

By the time I’ve got ready and put on my shoes

And looked out of the large window pane

The sun’s disappeared and the dark clouds have formed

And oh bugger, its started to rain.

There’s leaves on the ground and they crunch underfoot

When I finally get to go out

But a strange thing I see while I’m walking around -

Spring flowers! Now what’s that about?

Our weather is so temperamental you see

Its sunny, then pouring like heck

The rain’s horizontal, and then it is fine

What season’s this? I’d better check!

I could live somewhere like California

Where its summer most every day

But the sameness would soon drive me crazy

I quite like when its cloudy and grey.

I do wish it could be more consistent

Do we have to have sun, hail AND showers?

I’m not sure just how we accomplish

Four seasons in twenty-four hours!

Cheers For Chocolate

There are some things in life that you can’t do without

Those things that make everything great

When you’re feeling quite down or you’re sad or depressed

Here’s happiness right on a plate!

I’m talking ’bout chocolate, that food we all love

I don’t care if its milky or dark

Black forest or mint or the old fruit and nut

On a chocolate affair let’s embark!

There’s Snickers and Kit Kats and Crunchies and Twix

Of Reece’s I’ve got a huge stash

There’s chocolate chip cookies and then for a treat

A cake spread with creamy ganache.

Who doesn’t like chocolate? There’s no one I’m sure

Doesn’t crave that delicious ingestion

For the answer is chocolate every time

And you don’t even ask "What’s the question?"

I must say I feel quite a rush of delight

As those creme eggs go in through my lips

I cannot say no even though I’m aware

Of how long they will stay on my hips!

There’s some say that chocolate is better than sex

But I’m not sure if I’d go that far

It might just come close if you take off your clothes

And spread it all on from a jar!

And then when it’s late and the day’s at an end

And the final goodnights have been said

You can go in the kitchen and heat up some milk

And take your ‘hot’ chocolate to bed!

Survival

I had a little tumour that was growing in my head

And if they hadn’t found it I might very well be dead.

It wasn’t very obvious until there came a change

My family then all told me I was acting kinda strange.

I’ve always liked to sleep a lot, I’d always liked to eat

But then sleep took over munching and they realised things weren’t sweet.

I’d nod off in the waiting room each appointment that I had

And when you sleep throughout ‘Dunkirk’ you know it must be bad!

I went to meet a friend for lunch but never did arrive

Everything seemed normal when I set out for the drive.

I took the wrong off ramp you see, I realised straight away

But I somehow lost my bearings and I drove around all day.

I didn’t know just where I was, had not the slightest hunch

But the thing that really brassed me off - I never got to lunch!

My children all were worried, thought dementia had appeared

But then they took me for a scan and up that tumour reared!

They said it had been growing there for maybe fifteen years

They thought that they might lose me and the whole lot were in tears.

However I was fine - it didn’t bother me a lot

For I was quite doolally and I couldn’t care a jot!

They whisked me off and whipped it out, the verdict was benign

A round of radiation and I’m really doing fine.

Its helped to tell this story as it could have been much worse

But happily I’m still alive to write this grateful verse.

The Single Sock Saga

Running a household’s a hard thing to do

It’s the toughest damn job on the earth

Just trying to keep the place spotlessly clean

Is a headache for what it is worth.

You can keep your house tidy and clean as can be

Every morning you have to get to it

But nobody notices how hard you’ve worked

They just comment the day you don’t do it.

Now cooking and cleaning is really not hard

But there’s something we think of with loathing

And that’s the damned laundry - that horrible job

That surrounds you with dirty, wet clothing!

It’s the most boring task there can be in this life

As you wash all their T shirts and socks

Their mud-covered play clothes, their gear from the gym

Their trackies and knickers and frocks.

But all that goes into the washer it seems

Doesn’t always appear to come out

It is one of life’s mysteries week after week

You’ll know what I mean, I’ve no doubt.

The riddle I’m talking of sure stumps us all

As our bibs and our bobs intermingle

When you know that you washed a complete pair of socks

How the hell do you get back a single?

I’m sure that we’ve all got a big bag of socks

With all manner of patterns and hues

We just hope the ones that went AWOL come back

And we’ll match up the blacks, whites and blues.

But don’t hold your breath for it’s too much to ask

It is something eternally strange

So I think you should all bring your socks over here

And we’ll start up The Great Sock Exchange!

The Card

I called my Mum (my babysitter), from my work that day

To see how things were going. Her report:

"Well two of them are doing fine but one just won’t behave!"

(I must confess, exactly as I’d thought!)

She handed him the phone and so I gave it to him straight

"You’re eight years old, you mustn’t be so bad.

Your Gran is looking after you, you need to toe the line.

For when you don’t it makes me really sad!"

He obviously thought that he would need to make things right

He could tell that he was truly in big trouble

So he opened up his piggy bank and got onto his bike

And took off to the dairy on the double.

For Mother’s Day was coming up, he’d better take some action

And, naughty though he was, he loved me dearly

He had to go the extra mile to say that he was sorry

It called for something really special, clearly.

He couldn’t wait for Mother’s Day, his gift was in his hand

He hurried out like there was no tomorrow

He’d bought me chocolates and a card (appropriate he thought)

‘May God Be With You In Your Time of Sorrow’.

Clutter

The years have gone by and I’m ready to move

Into somewhere a little less spacious

But before then I fear there’s a lot I must clear

So my cleaning must be quite voracious.

My home used to be quite a showplace I guess

Of my pristine abode I was proud

It was hardly a chore, you could eat off my floor

(But of course that was never allowed!)

Then slowly the space that was clear was no more

And the stuff piled about was a jumble

How the hell did that happen, who put it all here?

My composure was starting to crumble.

The only place left I could sit was one chair

The others were covered in junk

I have no idea how this stuff all appeared

Could it be I’d been terribly drunk?

There were boxes that never had been there before

God knows what on earth they contained

There were newspapers, shopping bags, clothing galore

How can all this mess be explained?

I found seventeen packets of cat food untouched

They were piled up just inside the door

I’m hoping I won’t find the cat anywhere

’Cos it vanished in June of ’04.

Why on earth have I got all these plastic containers?

I don’t recall all that Chinese

There’s noodles for Africa, outdated milk and

two big tubs of old cottage cheese.

At least there are people to help me get back

To the home that was comfy and clear

I’ll call the decluttering people right now

Then I’ll get me a good auctioneer.

And people will come and they’ll look through my house

And they’ll say "This is lovely, lets buy it!"

Then I’ll smile and I’ll think I’m so glad they don’t know ...

But I’m just keeping sensibly quiet.

ANZAC Day 2020

This Anzac Day draws nearer and there’s not so many left

Of those bright eyed boys who left their native shores

They were SO young, so hopeful of a life that promised much

But they went to fight for freedom, mine and yours.

They left behind their families and so many tears were shed

By their mothers, fathers, aunties, sisters, wives

They never knew the horrors of the things that lay ahead

But willingly they fought and gave their lives.

The ones who came back home to us could often not share stories

Of the things they’d seen, those things they couldn’t tell

They quietly returned and tried to go on with their lives

Trying to forget they’d been through hell.

As life went on the years went by and they were getting old

They’d meet each year to talk and reminisce

And then they slowly left us, slipped away without a word

And we lost them, dearly loved and greatly missed.

Each Anzac Day there’s fewer now of these courageous men

Those once young boys are bent and frail and worn

Do not forget the lives we have today we owe to them,

Remember well this coming Anzac morn.

Our loved ones, we salute you, we will hold you in our hearts

You’ve done us proud, you’re heroes, truly great

We thank you for your sacrifice, you most beloved men

And say another heartfelt ‘Well done, mate!’

Failure

My face is red, my brow is wet,

My temper’s really frayed

I just can’t do it, it’s too tough

My failure is displayed.

Though many can, it’s just not me,

I’m useless through and through

They’ve tried to show me but it’s just

A thing that I can’t do.

I’ve tried my best, but I give up

I need a whisky - neat,

Don’t judge me harshly, life’s too short

To fold a fitted sheet!

60s Up

When we were in our 20s

most of us were having fun

We’d not too many worries I recall

Our main preoccupation was enjoying what life offered

It really felt like we could have it all.

Our 30s came around and some of us had settled down

We’d bought houses and had mortgages as well

And some had started families so the pace of life had changed

And a late night out just made the morning hell!

And then we’d reached our 40s, seemed to happen overnight

We were busy with careers and all that meant

And the years just flew so quickly that we didn’t feel them go

And for most of us our lives were quite content.

Then suddenly we’re 50, that dreaded Big 5-0

And the kids have gone and you’ve an empty nest

And hopefully the two of you have made it through as friends

You finally have your life back, thats the best!

Then 60 rolls around and you get a second wind

And grandkids may be there to share your life

Your main job is to spoil them and enjoy them while they’re young

And then give them back as soon as they cause strife!

So, 60s up is wonderful, your work life may be over

You find the time to travel once again

And life takes on a gentler pace, without the need to rush

And you have the time to catch up with your friends.

Its now you realise life is short, so live for every day

Take time to spend with those you love the best

I hope the passing years have been as happy as you hoped

Now raise a glass and let’s drink to the rest!

The Garden Club

Some people are right into fitness

While others go down to the pub

But one thing I am sure gives great pleasure

Is to be in a gardening club.

Everyone likes something different

Each person has something they love

And I’m sure that for most of you who’ve come today

It’s your hand in a gardening glove!

Life begins the day you start a garden

So the old Chinese proverb declares

A life full of flowers and veges and fruit

There’s no pleasure that even compares.

I once saw a quote that delighted

And I thought it was really quite clever

It said that one always should garden

As if you’ll be living forever.

Now I’ve heard that gardening adds years to your life

And also adds life to your years

And the beauty that you’ll have created

Is worth any blood sweat and tears.

You could spend every day in the garden

Just enjoying your time in the sun

But I truly believe that God made rainy days

So that gardeners could get housework done!

Political Pudding

The polls are in, the figures known

But is it done and dusted?

Seems National’s going to rise again

When ‘the economy turns to custard’!

If we’re comparing apples here

I hope I don’t sound rude

But I feel we’ll have a nice dessert

When one of them gets stewed!

Shakti

You might have read the poem of just how I can’t resist

Buying all those things they advertise

On TV infomercials and a lot of them relate

To things that make you sleep or help downsize!

And so I sent my money off and bought a shakti mat

Its a little like the Indian ‘bed of nails’

It offered numerous benefits

Through ‘thousands of sharp spikes’

And gives you clarity if memory fails!

Today the mat arrived and I’m right into good hydration

I’ve been drinking water morning, noon and night

I read up the directions and I lay down on the mat

It said that it would hurt ... and they were right!

But I’m no wussy pussy so I persevered and then

I went into the bathroom for a peek

It looks like I’ve got pinholes on my back and I’m concerned

I’ve had so much water that I’m going to leak!

Let It Be

I like a man who’s down to earth

Knows who he is and what he’s worth

Who’s clever, funny, has that spark

Who’s happy with the nickname ‘Dark’

I somehow feel it’s pretty grim

To think its right to speak for him

The Dark Destroyer’s what he’s called

And there’s no need to feel appalled

’No need for change’ is what Shaun said

The issue should be put to bed

Let’s just maintain the status quo

And all enjoy the brilliant show!

Discipline

Today I had to smile when I was browsing on the web

And came across an interesting fact

It seems the little royals would get ‘a clip around the ear’

Now who would ever think that they’d get smacked?

To tell the truth its good to see that we were not alone

And when it comes to kids we’re all the same

But then some new darned law was passed which said its not allowed

And any form of smacking would bring shame.

The law was trying to protect those helpless little ones

Who suffered violence nearly every day

Their homelife was so tragic and we all knew that it must stop

But sadly it did not work out that way.

And now the caring parents need to find a different way

And it seems that all their hands are truly tied

I’m sure that most of us have pushed a parent just too far

And felt a quite firm slap on our backside!

It never did us any harm and taught us right from wrong

We often knew just what we could expect

if we pushed the boundaries and did what we should not ...

but it disciplined us and it taught respect.

Those days have gone, the law came in, now no one lifts a hand

No matter what they do they are immune

Not like those days of old when the most naughty of my kids

Would often feel my trusty wooden spoon!

Bottoms Up!

Someone reminded me yesterday

Of the wine that’s called Mateus Rosé

Which got me to thinking of memories

’Bout those happenings back in the day

And about how and why I no longer

Sup a particular drink

For some incidents last for a lifetime

Regardless of what you might think!

My good friends have all heard the story

I was only 16 don’t you see

When I tried ‘mother’s ruin’ for the first time

And they found me passed out up a tree!

For the gin I was given had no mixer

And I obviously drank it down neat

To this day I can’t handle its perfume

A performance I sure won’t repeat!

I once had a not nice encounter

After quaffing some rather good port

I went out in the cold to see visitors off

And was feeling ok, so I thought

But the temperature was unexpected

The fire inside was quite hot

And although I’d enjoyed several glasses

Once outside I quite soon lost the lot!

I’m sure there were other occasions

That maybe I can’t bring to mind

But I know that there are a few memories

I am happy to leave far behind!

For now I am older and wiser

And I watch what I drink rather well

And if there are any more stories

They’re the ones I’m not going to tell!

The Murderhouse

In 1950 I turned five and toddled off to school

I was there to learn my reading, maths and writing

I found it lots of fun and thought that I was pretty cool

And all the things we did were quite exciting.

But there was something so uncool it made me really scared

I’d tremble like a tiny, frightened mouse

That day I would be summoned to take the dreaded walk

From my classroom to the awful ‘murderhouse’!

The nurse was very nice, a little hat upon her head

And she always had a special gift for me

I’m sure you’ll all remember, it was made of cotton wool

It was such a thrill to get that buzzy bee!

But then it turned to custard as I heard the frightening sound

Of the thing we called ‘the buzzer’ start to grind

I had to ‘open wide’ but it was hard for me to do

As the pain that it inflicted blew my mind.

And each six months thereafter I’d be filled with trepidation

For most of us back then had holes to fill

They say it was because our water had no fluoridation

But no matter what it was I feel it still.

Now that was many years ago, the buzzer is no more

The modern dentist’s not that hard to bear

The place it hurts us now is in the wallet or the purse

And ‘the murderhouse’ is just a bad nightmare!

Boarding School

There’s a certain institution that is known around the world

It is viewed in different ways of course, depending

On the time you had while you were there, which may have been just fine

Or you may have found the discipline unbending.

The place of which I’m speaking is, of course, the boarding school

Where some were sent to learn the ways of life

Most of us just settled down and tried to toe the line

While others found themselves in constant strife!

I have to say that sadly I’m the second type of child

My parents worked long hours and I was lonely

So they made the big decision when I was just eight years old

And they delivered to the school their one and only!

The boarding school was Catholic even though my family weren’t

And I loved all the traditions that I found

I was anxious to confess to Father all my childish sins

But the Sisters cottoned on and word got round!

I thought one day I’d made it and was sure I’d get redemption

For whatever sinful acts I had committed

Then a hand came through and grabbed me by the scruff of my wee neck

And I found that ‘coming clean’ was not permitted!

So I had to give that idea up and look for other things

To make the stay at school not quite so awful

I learned to ‘apple pie’ a bed, partake in ‘midnight feasts’

And several other things just quite unlawful!

A year went by so fast and I just wanted to come home

And by then I’d probably broken every rule

An eight year old could manage so I waved a last goodbye

To that never quite forgotten boarding school!

Just Checking

I’m looking a bit like a robot

There are wires in every place

There are some on my legs, on my head, in my hair

And even two stuck on my face!

I assure you its not some new fashion

Or accessories bought from a store

I’m just sleeping over in case I’m about

To stop breathing when I’m in mid snore.

Now its something no one will admit to

And it certainly has to be said

Its not that much fun if you can’t get to sleep

’Cos there’s somebody noisy in bed!

So I’ve come to get monitored properly

As I settle right down for the night

Its not that romantic, but it would be worse

If you woke and I just wasn’t right.

I’m hoping I don’t have a problem

But I’m doing the best I can do

And if you get cranky because you are tired

It isn’t just me .. you snore too!

Appy Days

I really love my Facebook

I know just how it goes

But other apps defeat me

How to use them heaven knows!

Now everyone loves Instagram

I guess I’d like it too

If someone could just show me

What the hell that I should do.

And though I am on Twitter

Its a mystery to me

It seems I have some followers

Who they are though I can’t see.

I may be getting older

But I think that I’m still fit

To use today’s technology

And not feel like a twit!

So I will try my darndest

And I swear I’ll not be beat

I’ll be right up there with the best

Once I begin to tweet!

Let’s face it, can it be that hard?

I’m sure that I can do it

I know you’ll all be followers

Once this technochick gets to it!

My Favourite Things (About Jamie)

Kids in pyjamas and Jools at the clothesline

Huge hearty dishes explode like a landmine

Family around him and all that it brings

These are a few of my favourite things.

Jools films by iPhone and Jamie’s unshaven

Seems that their home is a true happy haven

Down to earth humour and flavour that sings

Jamie produces some fabulous things!

Vege chili, creamy pasta, quesadillas too

Those things that I cooked when the family was there

But never when it’s Just You. 😪

So now I’m inspired and I’m really excited

Visit my kitchen and you’ll be delighted

And all that I ask is that each of you brings

Red wine and chocolate, my two favourite things!

Photos

The one thing that I loved to do when I was growing up

Was look through all the photos from the past

They were all so neatly placed in photo albums to keep safe

Though the image from a few just didn’t last.

We had our wee box cameras and then later Polaroids

Then the Kodak instamatic was the craze

We’d go down to the pharmacy and leave the photo roll

And we wouldn’t get the damn things back for days.

They really were expensive and would often not turn out

There’d sometimes be a thumb right in the way

Or there wasn’t anything to see or just a maddening blur

And we’d end up throwing half of them away.

But now that we’ve gone digital photography’s a breeze

And we snap each photo till we’ve got it right

Then we’d delete the duplicates and every one was great

And they’d stay there and would rarely see the light.

We no longer have our photos in an album to look through

As we hardly ever get them printed out

And they build up in the memory of each device we own

So many I’ve forgotten there’s no doubt.

There’s thousands now and printing every one just can’t be done

But each photo holds a special memory

So I’ve memory sticks and hard drives full of pics from years ago

And now I’m getting stressed its plain to see.

I’ll know I’ll have to knuckle down and get them sorted out

But the time that it would take’s a lot to ask

Then I realise we’re in lockdown and what else is there to do

So I’ll go and start the overwhelming task!

Perhaps I’ll do some photobooks

For that’s the modern way

And it seems to not display them is quite sad

Then once again we’ll all enjoy the photos that we took

And remember all the good times that we had!

Protection

This year a new accessory’s emerging

Its not jewellery or a handbag, but The Mask

And all around the world the folks are wearing different sorts

But how to make one do I hear you ask?

You need to have a good imagination

If you really want to stand out from the rest

And there are lots of things that you can wear upon your face

So here you go ... let’s put it to the test!

Now the first one’s really more for all the ladies

Who have a bra they’ve not used for a bit

But be sure that it’s a decent size and use the left hand cup

Or else you will just look like a right tit!

You can also cut a sock and make a good one

The internet will show you what to do

Its a perfect way to use the single sock that you got back

When you absolutely know that you washed two!

I saw a paper coffee filter also

One day when I was out upon my rounds

Make sure you use it when its clean, not after making coffee

Don’t want to see you choking on the grounds!

Now if you really want a unique face mask

To wear when you are out there for your jog

Just steal that large and useful piece of plastic

The Elizabethan collar from your dog!

But be careful when you take your partner shopping

And both of you are masked and looking strange

Make sure you take the right one home when it is time to go

Or you’ll need the 0800-SPOUSE EXCHANGE!

Surviving Teenagers

When your kids are little they consider you a hero

And they’re quite convinced that you know everything

Then as they grow somehow the stuff you know just turns to zero

Its normal, that’s what teenage years can bring!

For as they reach those awkward years their peers become their guide

And the influence of parents is much less

But we should always hang in there and still be by their side

For there’s times when they will find their thoughts a mess.

We wonder how that sweet wee girl’s now someone we don’t know

Or how our boy just vanished overnight

But they must all pass through it and if you can just hold on

Before too long they’ll hopefully come right!

Just keep communication and make sure they know you’re there

Don’t judge them and just try to be a friend

They need to learn what life’s about, that its not always fair,

But you’ve got their back and that will never end!

The Winner

I knew that late last night I’d be a multimillionaire

As I won the Lotto draw and scooped the pool

I’d planned and dreamed about the things that I could surely do

To make everyone so happy would be cool.

A brand new house for all the kids would be the first big spend

A cruise abroad for all the family

A hefty contribution to the friends I love the most

And a big donation to a charity.

I fell asleep and in the night I dreamed it all was real

And in the morning couldn’t wait to check

The six wee numbers plus the bonus matching those I had

on the ticket that I’d bought ... but what the heck?

It was true I was a winner but the figure was not right

I hadn’t won the millions I expected

As the sad reality sank in I had to face the truth

And the small amount I’d won left me dejected.

So sorry kids, no swanky house and friends, you’ll have to wait

Till I win the fifty million this weekend

Until then a coffee would be all I can afford

But don’t worry, we will get there in the end!

What Did You Do During Lockdown?

What did you do during lockdown?

Did you do all you meant to get done?

Did you clean out your cupboards or sort out your clothes

Or go out round the block for a run?

You didn’t? I’m so disappointed

You had oodles of time to just do it

But, like me, I am guessing you just put it off

Because one day you knew you’d get to it!

So like most of your friends and your family

You just kicked back and lay on the couch

And bingewatched those great Netflix series

And slowly morphed into a slouch.

The beer, wine and spirits were flowing

You tried to explain it away

When they said that you shouldn’t be boozing

You said "They’re my 8 glasses a day!"

It seems we were constantly hungry

And sadly it has to be said

That the most exercise I would get would just be

From the fridge to the couch to the bed!

Then suddenly it was upon us

Looked as if isolation would end

And we realised that none of our clothing would fit

Our habits we’d have to amend.

And we hoovered and dusted like crazy

There wasn’t a real need before

As we knew that nobody was likely

To just turn up and knock on our door!

So now it is back to the real world

After idleness of some duration

And a bit down the track we will fondly look back

To that time of enforced hibernation!

Ode To The Waikato

I really do love the Waikato,

The people, the countryside too

And I do wish I wasn’t in Auckland because

we’re on Three and they’re just Level Two!

I’ve spent so much time down there lately,

I’m beginning to think I belong

And I really just want to go pack up the car

and go back there, could that be so wrong?

So is it the air or the water

that makes them just so flaming nice?

If I didn’t have all of my family up here

I would come down and live in a trice!

But I guess I’ll just have to accept it,

and although we live so far apart

Just know that this Aucklander thinks you’re the best

and I’ll hold you all close to my heart!

No No No!

If there is a God in the heavens above

And if he cares the way that he should

He will make flaming sure that the orange-faced one

Stays away from the Mt Rushmore ’hood.

For its awful enough to know we’ll see his face

Every day until he gets kicked out

But imagine how gross to see that face up there

It would make me throw up, there’s no doubt.

So keep him away from Mt Rushmore we beg

Is it really just too much to ask?

If he wants his face seen by so many I think

Lets just make it a Halloween mask!

Good Advice

Now today I am asking a question

And I’d like you to give it some thought

What on earth would you say to your much younger self?

What is it you wish you’d been taught?

Just imagine if you could time travel

And meet yourself so long ago

What have you learned in the years that have passed

That you feel is important to know?

One thing that I’d say is to travel

Meet people of every race

Just learn all you can about others

And don’t spend all your life in one place.

Take care of yourself and stay healthy

Make sure you’re a genuine friend

Be generous, be loyal and be honest

It will carry you through to the end.

Remember not everything’s serious

Don’t forget to make sure you have fun

Making memories is just so important

They’re what’s left when the other stuff’s done.

I would talk to myself about diet

Just be wise would be one of my tips

For the fleeting delight of that chocolate

Means a lifetime of weight on the hips!

Don’t leap into things far too quickly

Consider the options instead

For each situation is different

Some are ruled by your heart ... some your head.

Make sure that you’re kind and you’re loving

Respect others ... and yourself as well

But whatever you do just jump right into life

So you’ve got some good stories to tell!

Thank You

I wrote my first poem in March of this year

I’ve now written 82 more

And I then had to set up a poetry page

So my verse I had somewhere to store.

I was quite blown away by the things that you wrote

By the generous comments received

I could not have imagined just where this would go

It is something I’d not have believed.

I never thought I was a poet you know

But its funny just what life can bring

For now its become a huge part of each day

And it just seems that writing’s my thing!

And in these few months I feel we’ve become friends

We’ve got something special we share

So I want to say thank you, wherever you live

You’ve just proved its a small world out there!

Forgotten Words

The language today is so different I know

It often leaves me feeling cold

The words and expressions we used way back then

Are the ones we remember of old.

If you were ‘knee high to a grasshopper’

As you probably were in your youth

And you said something silly

they’d say ‘tommyrot!’

‘that’s just claptrap!’ or simply say ‘strewth!’

If somebody thought you spoke rubbish

Then they would quite possibly say

‘You’re talking codswallop, you great nincompoop’

Those were favourites back in the day.

A convo was just called a ‘chinwag’

It was ‘corker’ to hang with your mates

You could go on a ‘bender’ and all get ‘pie eyed’

And then stagger back home through the gates.

‘Bob’s your uncle’ meant no need to worry

‘The cat’s miaow’ or ‘the bee’s knees’

Meant that you were a pretty cool person

In those days we were easy to please!

There are so many more I could mention

Please feel free to add some when you think

Of those old fashioned, funny expressions

For ‘a nod is as good as a wink’!

The British Connection

I realised today that my poetry page

Has been followed by quite a large group

From a beautiful town in Buckinghamshire

And I now feel that I’m in the loop!

It seems that the good folks of Aylesbury

Are reading the poems I write

And they’re ‘liking’ my Jan Beaumont Poetry page

And I have to say that’s a delight.

You’ll know that a number of Kiwis

Are descended from good British stock

Then we came to New Zealand and joined all the sheep

And now we’re just part of the flock!

But our love for our first home’s not vanished

And although it saw families depart

We’ve not lost our pride nor that feeling inside

And old England is still in our heart!

The Nasty Little Bugger

There’s little here I’m frightened of as in EnZed there’s not

Too many things that make your skin just crawl

But in the last few years we’ve often seen the nasty sight

Of an Aussie import creeping up the wall.

Now Aussies are a plucky bunch, they’re used to creepy crawlies

It seems that they are pretty hard to scare

We Kiwis often say that we could never live in Oz

Because of all the nasties over there!

They couldn’t send us snakes or crocs but they are never selfish

And they wondered if a Huntsman would suffice

But the Huntsman was too big to hide so they sent something smaller

The bloody whitetail spider.

That’s not nice.

And now we have to check our clothes, our curtains and our shoes

And turn the children’s bedding down at night

To see that one’s not lurking there between their Batman sheets

For whitetails have a quite ferocious bite!

And yet the thing that brings them in is not what you would think

It isn’t us they’re searching for at all

They’re after other spiders so make sure there’s none around

And you’ll not see these nasty beggars on your wall!

Stay Safe

The news released last evening was disturbing

Said Victoria now has a health disaster

And they’re going into lockdown hard to try and curb the spread

New Zealand’s done it and we know its faster.

Its not what everyone will want but do it

Just stay at home, enjoy the rest it brings

It won’t take long, and you will get your health and freedom back

Lets face it, the two most important things.

We’ve been there, done that, now we’re breathing easy

So do what must be done and you’ll find then

This awful thing that’s hit you will be beaten I am sure

And we’ll all be able to meet up again.

Cambridge Lions

When I was asked to come tonight I really felt quite honoured

I wasn’t sure if people would relate

The Lions motto is ’We Serve’ - you do such generous work

But I’m sure that doesn’t mean you’re all sedate!

A little humour’s necessary in this thing called life

A decent laugh’s important to survive

Lets face it, daily living is hard going at its best

And we know we’ll not get out of it alive!

I did a little digging as I really didn’t know

An awful lot about the things you do

And I was totally impressed with what I’ve learned so far

And I must say my understanding grew.

The work you do for others is just what its all about

Its what everyone should do for one another

But sad to say a lot of people get on with their lives

And never think to try and help each other.

So thank you for the work you do, I’m full of admiration

And I hope you’ve really had some fun tonight

Although the spelling’s different I’m a sort of a ‘tale twister’

And I trust that you’ve enjoyed the tales I write!

Cambridge Oaks

I made a quick visit down country

to a village they call Cambridge Oaks

I was there through a kind invitation

to share poems and read to the folks.

We’ve all had a day in our lifetime

we’ll remember for some time thereafter

And this day was definitely one of those times,

sharing good humoured friendship and laughter.

And when it was over I really felt sad

and I wished I was able to stay

So thanks for your wonderful welcome

and I promise to come back some day!

Islands In The Sun

Three islands in the sun

Shel-tering from Covid-19

All our days we will follow ways

Of good hygiene and noting where we’ve been.

Who’d have thought a short time ago

This darkness would overwhelm us all?

Just stay strong and it won’t be long

Before we see those big numbers fall.

Three islands in the sun

We’re so lucky to call this home

We will end it, and we’ll defend it

For we’re proud Kiwis although we roam.

We see others around the world

Coping with so much suffering

We’re so glad that things aren’t that bad

Its amazing what locking down can bring.

Three islands in the sun

Sadly we’ve had to close the door

But we’re sure if we just endure

Then one day we’ll be like we were before.

#NZHellhole

Some moron called EnZed "a hellhole"

Today we had nine covid cases

Almost fifty thousand or so, I believe

In one day’s what the USA faces!

The orange buffoon keeps repeating

That we’ve had a "massive outbreak"

And its "all over now" for New Zealand

Just how much more crap do we take?

He’s totally ruined their country

Almost all that he says is a lie

He’s so goddamned dangerous in power

Just how many more have to die?

So don’t try to comment on our house

You never took care of your own

And your people deserved so much better

How we wish you were "Address Unknown"!

Fathers’ Day

Today in the UK is special

And just the same in the US

In New Zealand its 6th of September

What is it? I’m sure you can guess!

If you said ‘Fathers’ Day!’ then you’ve got it

That day when we all give a shout

To those Fathers or Dads or Grandfathers or Pops

Who we all love so much there’s no doubt.

How on earth do we show him we love him

That could possibly be quite enough?

To thank him for being just all that he’s been

Always there when the going got tough?

Take him out for a family dinner

Or do something wonderfully mad

Or spend time just to talk and to tell him

How happy you are he’s your Dad!

For some of our Dads now aren’t with us

As sadly the time came to part

So treasure your Dad while you’ve got him to love

Then keep him right there in your heart.

Let’s All Drink To Lockdown

I’m normally a social girl

I love to meet my mates

But lately with the virus here

We can’t go out the gates.

You see, we are the ‘oldies’ now

We need to stay inside

If they haven’t seen us for a while

They’ll think we’ve upped and died.

They’ll never know the things we did

Before we got this old

There wasn’t any Facebook

So not everything was told.

We may seem sweet old ladies

Who would never be uncouth

But we grew up in the 60s –

If you only knew the truth!

There was sex and drugs and rock ‘n roll

The pill and miniskirts

We smoked, we drank, we partied

And were quite outrageous flirts.

Then we settled down, got married

And turned into someone’s mum,

Somebody’s wife, then nana,

Who on earth did we become?

We didn’t mind the change of pace

Because our lives were full

But to bury us before we’re dead

Is like red rag to a bull!

So here you find me stuck inside

For 4 weeks, maybe more

I finally found myself again

Then I had to close the door!

It didn’t really bother me

I’d wile away the hour

I’d bake for all the family

But I’ve got no bloody flour!

Now Netflix is just wonderful

I like a gutsy thriller

I’m swooning over Idris

Or some random sexy killer.

At least I’ve got a stash of booze

For when I’m being idle

There’s wine and whiskey, even gin

If I’m feeling suicidal!

So let’s all drink to lockdown

To recovery and health

And hope this bloody virus

Doesn’t decimate our wealth.

We’ll all get through the crisis

And be back to join our mates

Just hoping I’m not far too wide

To fit through the flaming gates!

Mother’s Day 2020

It’s time to remember our Mother today

That person so loved by us all

A person who always stood there by our side

In those years we were helpless and small.

As children we knew she was wiser than most

And we loved all those stories she’d tell

She’d always be there and she’d wipe away tears

As she comforted us when we fell.

Then as we got older she still had our backs

She’d always be there in a hurry

A fight with our siblings, the heartbreaks we had,

She would hug us and say ‘Don’t you worry.’

When we reached adulthood with kids of our own

Her help and advice were still there

Her kindness and knowledge inspired us all

She was always a breath of fresh air.

But time waits for no one and now all we have

Is the memory of our best friend

The one whom we loved and will never forget

She was there for us, right to the end.

So today, raise a glass, drink a toast to your Mum

We’d give anything for her embrace

If it wasn’t for her, none of us would be here,

That one we can never replace.

Lily Kate

My granddaughter smiles as she snuggles in close

I can see so much love in her eyes

"When I see you in heaven I hope you’re the same,

’Cos your hair is just the right size!"

I’ve loved her so much since the day she was born

The depth of that love fills my heart

I hug her and kiss her and hold her so tight

And I hate it when we have to part.

But my precious darling is growing so fast

And memories are all there will be

Of the time that we shared when she was a wee girl

And we snuggled, just Lily and me.

Captain Tom

He was somebody we’d never heard of

Just a man quietly living his life

But a man who’d seen things that he shouldn’t

Like battle and horror and strife.

He was loved and surrounded by family

Had a home and a warm comfy bed

Then the horrible virus that hit us

Changed the world when it reared its cruel head.

There were so many people who sickened

There were those who were fighting to live

And then there were those who were there by their side

Who were ready and willing to give.

Captain Tom saw a need to do something

He wanted to help where he could

He started to walk in his garden

Back and forth for the NHS good.

He wanted to raise just a thousand

He thought he could do it you see

But instead that old soldier raised millions

Just by walking each day tirelessly.

It’s not as if he was a young man

He had lived to a wonderful age

On his one hundredth birthday

They honoured him well

He now found himself on the world stage.

For on his centennial birthday

His name became almost eternal

They promoted the man who’d achieved oh so much

And Tom Moore went from Captain to Colonel!

Michael Ball and our Tom made a record

And it went to the top of the charts

The oldest man ever to be No 1

And of course No 1 in our hearts.

So we thank you for everything,

Colonel Tom Moore

You selflessly gave us your best

You have done us all proud, you’re a hero

Now just go put your feet up and rest!

Everyone Matters

All around the globe they are remembering George Floyd

It’s something that all decent folks should do

The sad thing is he’s not the first, but hopefully the last

For this man was just the same as me or you.

Every life is precious, no one greater than another

But it seems than inequality is rife

So many are defenseless and can never quite be sure

What act of violence may just take their life.

We all deserve our safety, whether we are black or white

Or any other colour in between

There are a lot of secrets that are never talked about

And now its time for these things to be seen.

We must protect those little ones who live in violent homes,

The elderly who often feel alone

Its time for all of those who may have seen but turned away

To say its something we will not condone.

Its true that black lives matter, always have and always will

But other lives we also must protect

No matter what our colour or our age, our sex or race

Every one of us is worthy of respect.

After Life

There’s a wonderful series on Netflix

You might know it, it’s called After Life

The story of absolute heartbreak

When Tony lost Lisa, his wife.

This show is so brilliantly written

It shows just how much the despair

Can engulf us when tragedy happens

And our loved one is no longer there.

He just doesn’t want to keep living

The pain that he feels is immense

But he somehow holds on and he learns to relate

Though his life without her makes no sense.

So Ricky Gervais, you’re amazing

Not just humour, but empathy too

I’ve got a new take on this thing they call life

I’m so glad, and its all thanks to you.

Is She Or Isn’t She?

For most of us when we tell lies

They come out through our lips

But thats not always true and so

You’re going to need some tips

For if Judith’s telling porkies

Here’s the whys and wheres and hows

Don’t think you’ll get it from her mouth

Just closely watch the brows!

The bigger the untruth she tells

The higher up they go

And if she’s really stretching it

There’s no way they will show

So watch those well-arched follicles

And just do not despair

You’ll know she can’t be trusted

When they hide beneath her hair!

It’s a Girl!

It seems National has a new leader

And it’s someone who’s waited for years

Yes Judith has finally made it

And now comes the blood sweat and tears

It’s a short time until the election

There’s a bloody big mountain ahead

If she wants to put National in power

And colour us blue and not red

And it’s true that she comes with some baggage

In the past she has fallen from grace

But I’m sure that she’s up to the challenge

And we’ve now got a two-woman race!

Judith’s Baptism Of Fire

She knew that it would not be easy

When she took up the reins just last week

But I’m sure she could not have imagined

That her lineup would start to look bleak

The saying of course is you’re only

As strong as your own weakest link

She’s been left up the creek by her colleagues

The canoe might be starting to sink

So we now wait to see if she’s got it

Can she pull it together real fast?

If not then I think she’s in trouble

And the time left to win might be past.

Who Next?

Each morning I wonder what news will appear

As I wake from my cosy night’s sleep

Will somebody else have been banished?

Does idiotic behaviour run deep

in the ranks of both Labour and National?

Have they suddenly all lost their mind?

Now David and Hamish and Andrew and Iain

Have either been sacked or resigned!

They can now ponder if it was worth it

To throw a good future away

By deciding they just wouldn’t play by the rules

And I’m sure that they’ll all rue the day!

May The Best Man Win

Every day we would watch TV One

When Jacinda and Ashley appeared

They’d give us the news about COVID-19

And we hoped it was not what we feared.

But day after day the new cases increased

And lockdown we all had to face

And we listened to news from the rest of the world

And were glad that we lived in this place.

We all stayed at home and we followed the rules

At least that’s what most of us thought

Yet one front line person decided that he

could do just as he liked ... and was caught!

It wasn’t just once that this guy thumbed his nose

Thought one rule for us, one for him

He went to the beach, then a ride on his bike

Which just made him look terribly dim.

Somehow he survived as the times were so tough

But again he made everyone cuss

When instead of accepting he’d not done his job

He threw Ashley right under the bus.

And Ashley’s a man who had fronted each day

Who’d been there through thick and through thin

And we weren’t going to take it, someone had to go

And we all said it sure won’t be him.

But now we’ve come through it, the rulebreaker’s gone

We’ve all breathed a sigh of relief

And Ashley can now take a well deserved break

He’s more than completed his brief!

Goodbye

The news that’s emerged is appalling

It confirmed Michelle Boag was the talker

And personal info she somehow acquired

She passed to MP Hamish Walker.

Todd Muller is quite rightly seething

Clutha-Southland is feeling the same

And Walker has done what was needed

And literally followed his name!

For Walker released private details

And for that he was rightly cut loose

His actions were totally loathsome

And amounted to personal abuse.

It’s hard to know Boag’s motivation

Which was quickly and rightly attacked

Tough luck for them both they were National

For in Labour they’d never be sacked!

Words Fail Me

A young politician’s career’s disappeared

For Hamish a week straight from hell

Through the quite inexcusable and unforgivable

Actions of stupid Michelle!

She should have been there as a mentor for sure

Or even a party-based friend

She’s enjoyed all the power she had through the years

But she’s now brought his dreams to an end!

Of course he just shouldn’t have done what he did

And now his career has gone south

But he wouldn’t have had any info to share

If that woman had just zipped her mouth!

Changing The Guard

Another big day in our country today

With the news that we woke to this morning

For Todd Muller announced he can’t take any more

And he gave up without any warning.

If you vote National I’m sure you’re in shock

If Labour I guess you won’t worry

But there’s one thing for sure they will need to move fast

And appoint someone else in a hurry.

So we now wait to see who will come to the fore

Maybe Simon with all that he brings

But each dog has its day so the old story goes

And we know who just waits in the wings!

Time To Emerge

Lockdown has not been as hard as I feared

In fact, rather good in a way

It was great to wake up, breathe a sigh of relief

Then sit and relax for the day.

I knew that no guests would just knock on my door

So the house didn’t need to look great

I still kept it clean but it wasn’t the end

of the world to see one dirty plate!

I could stay up quite late then sleep in the next day

Had the time to just read a good book

Then if I was tired I’d go back to bed

And it wasn’t important to cook.

For instead of full meals I was happy to grab

Some quickly prepared little snack

I could go for a walk and breathe in the fresh air

And just take my sweet time getting back!

But the weeks have gone by and I’m ready I think

To get up and then make up my face

Go out through the gate and discover once more

That the world is a beautiful place!

Letter From NZ

Dear England, we know that you’re suffering

It appears in the news every day

We just can’t imagine, it must be so hard

But the thing that I wanted to say

Is we’re sending our love and just hoping

That you’ll be back to normal real fast

For you’re all in our thoughts, and we’re certain

This madness can’t possibly last.

And America, we see your trauma

And we know that you’re going through hell

So we send our best wishes and hope that

We’ll hear very soon that you’re well.

To the rest of the world, we are with you

We are one, there’s no difference at all

Everybody’s a child of this planet

And we all have the right to stand tall.

So we’re sending our love from New Zealand

Don’t give in, fight the fight, try to smile

Remember that nothing’s forever

We’ll be back to ourselves in a while.

A Shaggy Tale

My hairdresser - like me -

is still on lockdown

My image in the mirror’s

made it crack

I’m thinking I should go

into the bedroom

Turn the lock and stay there

till she’s back.

I look like some untidy

scruffy hobo

My unkempt mane has turned

from blonde to white

Its grown like garden weeds

In summer rainfall

I’m honestly

A most peculiar sight.

I used to be a natural

shade of auburn

Not ginger, but a rather

fetching red

But now the white

has started reappearing

And what I’ve got’s

a ‘piebald’ look instead.

I guess I’ll have to self apply

some colour

It seems the only thing

that I can do

I’ll tuck the messy strands

behind my earlobes

And say a silent prayer

For Level Two.

On Level Four we can’t

Go out to movies

No takeaways or cream cakes

From the caf

No shopping, and no visits

To our girlfriends,

This lockdown lark is well

And truly naff.

So Level Three should see us

slightly better

We’re hoping that the weeks

will somehow fly

But Level Two’s the one

I’m hanging out for

Its enough to make me

drink the cabinet dry.

My image now has gone from

bad to shocking

I think I’ll have to put it

To the vote

I’m off to get the

biggest sharpest razor

But ... do I cut my hair

Or cut my throat?

This virus seems to be

A little weaker

I hope so - I can feel

It in my gut.

Let’s hope we’re down

from Three to Two real quickly

’Cos I’m desperate for

a dye job and a cut!

Thank Goodness

Thank goodness we’re here in New Zealand

Thank God there are places we’re not

I’d rather be here with Jacinda

Than with Donald or Boris or Scott!

Freedom

The very first thing I will do when I’m ‘free’

Is to hug all my grandkids so tight

For its been far too long that we’ve been so apart

I’m a Nana, it just isn’t right!

And then after that I’ll go out on the town

And meet all of my friends for a drink

I’ve never been one to imbibe all alone

So it really makes sense don’t you think?

But before I do that I will get my hair done

Need a colour and cut and some styling

I’ll get plucked, waxed and massaged and manicured too

And I know I’ll come out of there smiling!

The things that I’ve missed since the lockdown began

Is the company and good conversation

Of the very dear mates who I just haven’t seen

And its caused me enormous frustration.

I want to go shopping, just walk round the stores;

To the nursery to buy some new flowers

My petunias are wilting, my pansies look sad

’Cos there’s been very few autumn showers.

I want icecream, and movies and walks in the park

A lovely long stroll on the beach

All those things that we missed when we couldn’t go out

Those things that were so out of reach.

And when it’s all over and ‘normal’ again

We’ll remember these months that have passed

We’ll go for a stroll and breathe in the fresh air

And we’ll smile and we’ll whisper ‘at last!’

Good News

Today we had the greatest news

Our country’s COVID-free

For seventeen whole days we’d no new cases

The PM just informed us that we’re down to Level One

Which means we’re free to visit friends and places!

We’re just a tiny country at the bottom of the world

But we pulled together for the greater good

We all went into lockdown hard and earlier than most

We had to stay inside, we understood.

We all made sacrifices and we acted as a team

The whole 5 million Kiwis played their part

We realise just hard it is for others round the world

But just know it can be done, and don’t lose heart!

Ode To The Booze Trolley

I used to love stuffed animals

We’d cuddle up in bed

But now I am an older girl

I like to drink instead!

Like many other little girls

I had a favourite dolly

But now I am a grown up and

I have a fancy trolley.

My trolley is my pride and joy,

A much admired possession

And though originally for tea

I’m making a confession.

It now holds vodka, rum and gin,

Cointreau, bourbon, whisky,

There’s Malibu, Bacardi too

No wonder I’m so frisky!

Though I don’t drink tequila

It is there for those who do

I also have French cognac

German schnapps and sake too.

There’s beer and Guinness

Cocktail mixes, cider and vermouth

I’m looking like an alkie

(Which is nowhere near the truth!)

I’ve pinot gris and pinot noir

Chardonnay and sav

Riesling, rosé, cabernet

Just tell me what you’ll have!

And then there’s Bailey’s and Kahlua

There’s liqueurs, port and sherry

If you come to visit me

You’ll certainly get merry.

I’ll make you a martini,

Pour a cocktail or a juice

You’ll need to stay the night though

As your legs will sure feel loose!

You’re welcome at my trolley bar

Come round and drink a toast

I’d love to see you and I’ll be

A most congenial host!

Coming Out

I may very well start a new diet

I think it’s a good thing to do

Let’s face it, I’ve been a bit naughty

And my figure is showing it too!

The trouble is, which one to follow?

Each one of them’s worked in the past

The only thing is, for the program to work

You’ve got to make sure it’ll last!

How long it will take is the biggie

Can you lose 40 pounds in a week?

Can I still have my booze if I’ve got lots to lose?

If not then the future looks bleak.

I’ve lost thousands of pounds in my lifetime

I’ve lost inches from every place

If I think I’m so clever

Then why can’t I ever

Not have a big fat about-face?

I’ve tried some incredible diets

Some mainstream and some a bit queer

Had so many beans on the F Plan

I was truly not nice to be near!

And Weightwatchers worked for a long time

I joined about 10 times you see

They had so many records in so many names

And they didn’t twig all those were me!

Who comes up with all of these diets?

Which one should I choose is the question

Is it Paleo, Atkins, Dukan or South Beach?

No wonder I’ve got indigestion.

I could name oh so many new food plans

Cabbage soup didn’t go down too well

It’s true it was highly nutritious

But I just couldn’t live with the smell!

The Mediterranean Diet

Was so healthy and really looked fine

So I couldn’t believe that I gained fifteen pounds

Do you think it could be all that wine?

And then there’s the mad Werewolf Diet

You fast through a full or new moon

Decided I didn’t want hairs on my chest

Won’t be trying this any time soon!

Went keto and was quite successful

Low carb seemed a great way to go

It became automatic and I was ecstatic

My hip bones were starting to show!

But nothing with me lasts forever

And I put it all back, even more

Though I felt so ashamed no one else could be blamed

So I’m fasting ... oh no, what a bore!

Who knows when this lockdown will finish

And I’ll finally have to come out

I’d better pull finger, theres no time to linger

I’ll feel so deprived there’s no doubt.

So I’ll go and get my big girl panties

Pull them up, get a grip, knuckle down

I’ll ziplock my mouth when it’s not time to eat

Then I’ll see you back out on the town!

Trouble In The Village

There’s trouble in the village

Mrs G is really down

Shes threatening to storm the gates

and go out on the town.

We’ve told her that it isn’t safe

But will she listen? No!

She says she’s out of chocolate

And she really needs to go.

And Maisie’s feeling quite annoyed

Her man can’t come and visit

She told us its platonic

But be honest Maisie, is it?

She’s worried if he can’t get in

And she cannot get out

He’ll meet some other OAP

(There’s a lot of them about).

Now Fred can’t go out walking

and he really likes his grub

If he can’t get any exercise

He’ll end up a little chub.

And Evie’s cat is peeing on

Her neighbour’s prized begonia

She’s angry and is ready with

A bottle of ammonia.

There’s trouble in the village

And the people aren’t amused

There’s no cafe, bar nor hair salon

The bowling green’s not used.

It’s fair to say they’re twitchy

I don’t hear a single laugh

It’s not much fun cooped up all day

Just with your better half!

Some of us had coloured hair

Which now is turning white

The manicures have disappeared

Not a well groomed nail in sight.

But the things that matter still remain

Like kindness and respect

The friendship that we all enjoy

Can’t possibly be wrecked.

So the trouble in the village

Doesn’t actually exist

It’s only that the friends we’ve made

Are really, truly missed.

We’ll all come out the other end

Maybe better than before

And trouble in the village

Won’t be trouble any more!

The Lockdown Story

There’s a thing that’s been occurring that has made me want to shout

It’s a mystery how and where it all got started

It’s all about a poem that went viral round the world

And made me quite considerably downhearted.

For you see I wrote this poem on my couch late in the day

And I put it out there on my Facebook page

My daughter said "go public, just let everybody see"

And from then it was upon the open stage.

At first they shared from Facebook and they passed it to their friends

And my name was there for everyone to see

But then the cut and paste began, the author’s name was lost

It no longer was attributed to me.

It seemed to be a mystery from whence the poem came

But someone seemed to think they had a clue

For the style in which it’s written seemed familiar at the time

And suddenly just everybody "knew".

There is a well known poet who is loved around the globe

Her work is just amazing to behold

And it was such a compliment to be compared to her

But it just could not be stopped if truth were told.

That very gracious lady tried so hard to set it straight

But by then the story’d travelled far and near

And the work I was so proud of slipped away so easily

But now I’ve got the chance to make things clear.

I’m thrilled it’s been so well received, I couldn’t wish for more

And I think the story now is getting known

So I’m very glad that all of you enjoyed my words so much

And I feel that in the end its come back home!